I’ve been reminded lately how much the Devil really wants you to sit in your sin. To feel the shame and guilt from it, and to let it impact the way that you see yourself and your future. The Devil really wants to keep you in this shame instead of you talking it through with God. Because he knows that if you stay distracted in sin, you’ll disqualify yourself and it’ll distance you from God.
I’ve been guilty of this so many times. It’s easy to fall into and spiral from there.
I’ll have a bad day where I feel rushed, irritable, cranky, and impatient. I’ll either say things I don’t mean or say too many things that shouldn’t be said. I won’t treat people with the same level of kindness that I normally would on a non-irritable day. And it eats at me. I start to feel like a failure, that I’m a terrible, fake Christian who clearly just will never hit the mark. I feel so unworthy and angry at myself for messing up again.
And I think in order to do this whole Christian life better, we need to remember that this is going to keep happening in our lives. We’re going to do bad things or say things that we shouldn’t or act in a way that doesn’t please God. And we need to have a plan in place for the times where we do fail, otherwise I think we’re more at risk of truly failing as we grow distant to God.
And I’m not saying that we should plan to sin to justify it or make it less impacting – because all sin has an impact whether we like it or not – but to remind ourselves that we’re always going to miss the mark. This will keep happening in our lives and we have to be reminded to not get discouraged and stay there in it (if you’re there right now just remember Romans 8:1).
We have to remember to turn to God when we feel the remorse or the shame that bubbles up inside of us after this, rather than trying to figure it out on our own or hide it away hoping that it’ll go away (Proverbs 28:13). Or worse, disqualifying ourselves entirely from the Christian life because now we’re one of “those Christians” who acts badly and messes it up for everyone.
Wake up call: we’re all going to do that.
And if you think you won’t, then you need to do some reflection. Ask those closest to you – they’ll tell you that you do, in fact, have some area that you aren’t reflecting God’s goodness, love, or kindness in. I promise you. No one is perfect. We’re all going to fall short (Romans 3:23-24).
2 Corinthians 12:9 says, “My grace is sufficient for you for my power is made perfect in your weakness.” His grace is sufficient for you. We’re going to mess up. We ourselves are insufficient without God. Are we able to let His grace be sufficient for all of the bad things we’ve done and for the areas we struggle in the most? For all of the bad, irritable days when we should have been better or done better?
I’m not saying that we should just keep doing what we’re doing and fall on God’s grace and move on with our lives. That’s not how repentance works (Romans 6:1-2). Repentance means making amends, saying you’re sorry, being transformed through the Holy Spirit, putting up boundaries where they are lacking.
Repentance doesn’t mean sitting in remorse and hoping things get better. Godly sorrow brings repentance (2 Corinthians 7:10-11).
Repentance knows that you’re going to fail over and over but you’re going to do the things that are in your control to prevent them from happening again. You’ll let God do what only He can do in your life and you’ll do what you can.
So, the next time you’re spiraling into the darkness of feeling like an imposter or feeling like you’re never going to be good enough, just remember these words – His grace is sufficient for you. The goal isn’t behavior modification, it’s heart transformation and a full reliance on God every single day.
